What I learned from
this journey is that single fathers go through the same struggle as single mothers
but we are not treated the same. I
mentioned in my blog that some women feel that they do not need a positive
father in their child’s life and their nurturing skills alone are enough to
raise a child. Not true, in fact
according to a study done by the U.S. Department of Education, “An active and
nurturing style of fathering is associated with better verbal skills,
intellectual functioning, and academic achievement among adolescents.” The majority of us are portrayed in the media
as dead beat dads. Not true, in fact
from my own experience I worked two part-time jobs, arrange for family members
to care for her while I was at work because ‘Care for Kids’ was getting pretty
expensive. The media rarely report
positive single fathers working 7 days a week with no days off, struggling to
make ends meet. Most of us single
fathers are sometimes affected by job lose and the way society view men is that
we are raise to have a shell shock exterior.
Our society is structure that we should not ask for help from the
government to help us support our kids.
Single fathers asking for financial, emotional or physical help is view
by some people as a sign of weakness. I
learned that what is often exposed from the media is that fathers are
irresponsible and non-supportive to our children which are often not the case. Committed single fathers go out of their way
to be there for their children. One
gentleman who I met from The Russell Chris stated, “No matter what the
financial obstacle, visitation rights, and custody battles I may endure my
child will appreciate my effort as she gets older.” In fact, most fathers who seek custody feel
an even stronger bond with their children.
The media paints a picture that single fathers are incompetent and
lazy. For example, Sarah Petersen from
Deseret News reported, “A Huggies diapers commercial which aired early last
year stated, to prove Huggies can handle just about anything, we put them to
the toughest test imaginable: dads, alone with their babies, in one house, for
five days.” This makes me sick to my
stomach knowing that hardworking fathers out there today are making sacrifices
for their children to have a better future.
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